Lismore, Australia – A recent study has revealed that children involved in Australian family court proceedings often feel unheard and sidelined despite decisions made in their "best interests."
The study, conducted by researchers at Southern Cross University and published in Child and Family Social Work, interviewed 41 children and young people aged 10 to 19 from Queensland, New South Wales, the Australian Capital Territory, and Victoria. Four key themes emerged from their experiences: feeling silenced, being kept in the dark about proceedings, defying court orders, and struggling with trust issues.
Children Feel Silenced
Many children expressed frustration at not having their voices adequately represented. Some reported feeling like they were not given a chance to speak, while others believed professionals misinterpreted their words.One participant, 14-year-old Penny (names changed for anonymity), likened the experience to having her mouth covered: "I should have been allowed in the courtroom and been allowed to say what I wanted."
Others felt that their concerns were dismissed, with 15-year-old Chelsea stating, "I just had to do what I was told and be quiet and suck it up, even if it wasn’t what I wanted."
Lack of Information Leaves Children ‘In the Dark’
Most children in the study reported feeling uninformed about the court process. Eleven-year-old Olive admitted she had “no clue what was going on,” while 13-year-old Leo described his experience as “playing the guessing game.”Some children resorted to finding out information on their own. Thirteen-year-old Ava revealed she snooped through her mother’s belongings and researched the judge who ruled on her case, saying, "She, like, ruined my life. Need to know who."
Conversely, others felt overwhelmed with too much information. Twelve-year-old Eva shared, "Mum told me too much about the court stuff, and I wish she didn’t. I should just be a kid."
Children Defying Court Orders
Some children refused to comply with parenting orders because they felt their wishes were disregarded. Ava, 13, expressed her frustration by saying, "If they can’t listen to me, I’m not going to listen to them."Fifteen-year-old Chelsea refused to visit her father despite the court ruling, stating, "I wasn’t listened to at all. In the end, I put my foot down and said, ‘I’m not going.’"
Others took matters into their own hands, such as 16-year-old Aaron, who, along with his siblings, chose to live with his father despite the court ordering them to stay with their mother.
Eroding Trust in Adults and the System
Children also distrust family law professionals, particularly when their words were shared with their parents without consent. Fourteen-year-old Troy explained, "If I knew what I said was going to get back to Dad, I wouldn’t have said it."Jessica, 16, echoed this sentiment, saying, "I needed more reassurance that what I said wouldn’t get back to my dad, because if I was sent back, it could have really, really hurt me."
Eighteen-year-old Gabrielle expressed how the experience affected her long-term trust in adults, stating, "I lost a lot of trust. I couldn’t trust anyone again."
The Call for Change
The study highlights the need for improved communication, transparency, and child-centered approaches in family law. Researchers are now working with the participants to develop a children’s participation toolkit designed to inform children of their rights and help them engage meaningfully in the court process.As 11-year-old Olive said, "You gotta listen to the children, ‘cause it’s their lives. But sometimes, they’ve got some pretty great ideas, too."
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